Relationships2 min(s) read
Published 14:34 15 Jan 2026 GMT
A sex expert has weighed in on the number of times a week couples should be having sex - and their verdict has left many people stunned.
Sex is often an important part of a relationship, but the topic of how often people get freaky between the sheets can leave people divided.
Now, there's no right or wrong answer as everyone's different - some couldn't imagine a day without it, while others prefer to get jiggy once in a blue moon - but an expert has shared what the optimal amount may be.
Dr Karen Gurney, a clinical psychologist and sex expert with over 20 years of experience helping couples tackle issues within their sex lives, revealed all on the Diary of a CEO podcast.
Dr Gurney explained that "one of the big myths" people often believe - and thus compare themselves to - is the frequency of sex, explaining that while "everyone says three times a week", that is nothing more than an "urban myth".
She explained: "It's actually drastically different than that, the average times people in the UK and it's replicated around the world.
"What's fascinating is we're using frequency as a yardstick of a good sex life. There's no correlation between the frequency of sex and sexual satisfaction.
"You could be having sex once a year that completely blows your socks off, makes you feel alive, makes you feel super connected, that's really exploratory where you lose yourself in it.
"That is better than having sex once a day where you're not enjoying it, your mind's not in it, it's not pleasurable, you're feeling disconnected. You're feeling awkward."
She revealed that the average British couple is actually having sex around three times a month on average, but the difference in couples varies greatly.
Some couples reported that they hadn't had sex in months "and were quite happy with that" while there was also "plenty of people having sex more".
She also noted that most of the respondent wanted to be having "more sex, better sex" than they were currently having, but added that the pressure to perform or meet a perceived expectation ended up making sex worse in relationships.
"Pressure is a total passion killer," she revealed, adding that issues with communication were also creating problems in the bedroom.
Dr Gurney added that the amount of sex people were having doesn't actually matter or need to live up to anyone else's tally as long as the sex you're having works for the couple themselves.
So it's time to stop comparing your frequency to others as long as you and your partner are happy with what you've got going on.
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